Papercuts
by Mists
Summary: Set after the Last Battle in DH. Ron cleans out Fred's study and finds his diary. Will it help Ron come to terms with his brother's passing? Or will it help him face the darkness in himself? Oneshot.


Disclaimer: I don't own the HP series in anyway shape or form. This one shot takes place a couple of weeks after the Final Battle in DH. Please enjoy.

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**-Papercuts-**

**By: Mists**

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Ron opened the squeaky old door to Fred's study with a cough. His brother had never been the cleanest person so he was not surprised to find a thick layer of dust on everything, even though it had only been three weeks since…

But then he really didn't want to think about that.

He was here on a mission, and he wouldn't let his emotions get the better of him. So he pushed them down and locked them away in his heart, to be dealt with at a later time….

Or that's at least what he told himself.

Ron entered the room above the joke shop with utmost caution. He knew that if anyone had booby traps in his office, it was definitely Fred. Ron smiled at this, remembering how Fred and George use to booby trap their room and set up pranks to get Percy.

His short lived chuckle turned into a painful sigh as he pushed through Fred's piles upon piles of vertically stacked papers and books.

"_Hermione would have a conniption if she saw this. Who on earth would stack books this way?" _thought Ron as the door suddenly slammed shut behind him and the room went dark.

"_Damn it! I knew this would happen!" _thought Ron as he took the Deluminator out of his pocket.

George should really be the one going through Fred's things, not him. He'd know how to disarm most of Fred's spells, but Ron didn't have the heart to say no when George asked him to do it. He knew how painful it was for George this soon after Fred's passing.

But the reality of it was that they had no choice.

Fred handled most of the business part of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes while George focused on inventing. Fred was always the more outspoken of the twins. He could turn sales pitches with a style all his own. George would mostly take cues from Fred about when to speak or how to act.

Now that Fred was gone, George had become very quiet and would lock himself in his lab for days at a time trying to balance the books and create new joke ideas. But as George tried to shut himself off from the world, the business began to suffer greatly. That was when Ron offered to help George with the financial end of the business.

George reluctantly took him up on the offer, with a little encouragement from their father.

He agreed to let Ron help on one condition….

That Ron would be the one to clean out Fred's study.

So there he was, trapped in a dark room with Godric knows what, looking for his brother's accounting books.

"_Great,"_ thought Ron sarcastically as he flicked the Deluminator releasing its light into the room.

The orbs slowly traveled up to the ceiling and hovered there like large fireflies.

Ron readied himself for whatever would come next…..

Suddenly, Peeves' like laugher filled the room.

"**You've come quite far, but that's all you'll go! **

**Now face your fear, and enjoy the show! HAHAHAHA!"**

As the cackling voice faded away, a fierce wind picked up sending the papers flying about the room with increasing speed.

Ron quickly covered his eyes as the whirlwind focused its energy on him. The papers sliced at his exposed flesh leaving long shallow cuts in their wake. But Ron was numb to that kind of pain.

He peered out through the small opening between his fingers. What he saw made him want to laugh and cry at the same time.

Thousands upon thousands of large spiders now filled the room. They fought through whirlwind to get to him.

Ron smiled bitterly as a tear rolled down his face.

Fred was the one who had given him his fear of spiders by turning his teddy bear into one while he slept. It was ironic that the first thing he had to face after Fred's death was a gigantic spider. For the first time since the prank, he wasn't afraid of the creatures. He just coldly stared them down and hexed them with all his might.

Fred had been the root of his fear.

Fred was gone.

There was nothing more to fear.

And so his fear of spiders died with Fred.

…He wished with all his might he could have it back.

Ron gripped his wand hard, as he unleashed his rage upon the unsuspecting spiders.

"STUPEFY!" he yelled as the spell exploded at the spiders from all sides.

The wind ceased as the spiders and loose papers floated gently back down to the ground.

As the spiders hit the floor, they shriveled up and turned into smoke.

Ron panted heavily as he fell to his knees with a loud thud.

The door to the attic burst open as he heard George call from downstairs, "You all right up there, Ron?"

With a roll of his eyes he called back, "Oh yeah, I'm just peachy!"

"Good for you," replied George, "Oh and watch out for that Fear Embodiment spell, it's a nasty one!"

Ron felt ready to go down there and punch him right in the gut. Maybe he _had_ gotten some of his sense of humor back.

"Okay, I'll keep that in mind!" yelled Ron as he slammed the door shut with a satisfying bang.

"Stupid George, trying to kill me…" grumbled Ron as he made his way across the even MORE scattered field of papers over to Fred's desk in the back of the room.

With a sigh, he pulled out the comfy chair from behind the desk and sat down.

Of course the second his butt hit the seat it made a loud farting noise.

"_Why am I not surprised?"_ thought Ron as he examined the papers placed on Fred's desk.

There were all sorts of files from various clients thrown about the place. Ron decided to start by sorting them into piles alphabetically and to go from there.

There were reports from sellers, business deals with candy stores, and other novelty shops. Ron found Fred's business ledger with a moldy pumpkin pastry stuck on top of it.

If Hermione ever criticized his lack of cleanliness again; he was going to bring her here just to show her how messy he could be.

The ledger had a chart in it sectioned into columns and rows. A spell automatically calculated the expenses and income of the company when a new amount was written in the chart.

Ron had to smile at this, it was ingenious really. He'd have to show the spell to Hermione later. If they could find a way to replicate its affects they could mass produced ledgers like this one worldwide. Wizarding businesses would eat it up and they could make quite a bit of money.

With a smile, Ron put the little book aside on the desk. It was then that he noticed there was a drawer on the bottom right of the desk that he still had yet to open.

"_Funny, how did I miss that one? …Could there be a Disillusionment Charm on it?" _thought Ron as he tried to reach out and open the drawer. Ron felt a bit of static run up his arm as the charm dispelled.

"It really was a Disillusionment Charm….what on earth could be so important that Fred would use a spell that strong?" whispered Ron to himself as he tugged on the drawer's handle.

"Dang, it's locked," he said. Taking out his wand, Ron used the Alohomora spell.

The lock instantly clicked and the drawer slid open.

"Huh. That's odd. He went to all that trouble to hide this and it opened with just Alohomora?" pondered Ron as he reached into the drawer and removed its contents.

Surprisingly, all Ron found was a dusty old diary with nothing written in it. Every single page was blank.

Ron raised his eyebrow as he flipped through the empty pages.

"There's no way that this can be all there is…." said Ron as he tried to write on one of the diary's pages. But for some reason, the ink wouldn't touch the paper. Ron tried his quill on another scrap of paper he found and it worked find.

"Hmm…" mumbled Ron as he crossed his arms in thought.

Then, suddenly, his eyes shot open as he laughed, "Of course! Why didn't I think of it before?"

Ron picked up his wand and pointed it at the diary and said, "I solemnly swear, that I'm up to no good."

And with those words, the ink became visible on the cover page.

_Congratulations, you have found the Diary of Fred Weasley. If anyone divulges its existence to my prat of a brother, Percy, I will make sure you're death is slow and painful_.

Ron laughed so hard he nearly fell out of the chair. Now he remembered! He had seen this book before! One Christmas the Weasley family had decided to play secret Santa and get one another a gift. Fred's reaction to the gift Percy got him was priceless, "What the hell? A _diary,_ Percy? Diaries are for girls!"

Percy coughed into his hand and stated that _he_ kept a diary.

Fred just snorted and rolled his eyes, "Like I said, diaries are for girls."

It took Ron's dad a good five minutes to break up the ensuing fight. After which Fred exclaimed as he went to his room that he would never EVER use the stupid thing in a million years!

"_Looks like he lied,"_ thought Ron as he turned the first page of the book.

"OW! Damn it!" yelled Ron as the crisp edge of the page sliced a deep cut into his finger.

Ron glared at the papercut as thick blood began to ooze from the wound. With a sigh Ron stuck his finger in his mouth to suck away the blood.

The familiar bitter taste of iron caressed his taste buds as he used his left hand to continue turning the pages. Ron flipped through the book until the mentioning of his name caught his eye.

_Hey there,_

_It's me again, but then who else would it be? Hehehe…just kidding. You aren't going to believe this, but Ronniekins OUR Ronniekins actually saved Ginny from You-Know-Who somehow! Even I don't know how! George and I were using the map to search everywhere for her, but somehow little Ronnie and Harry found out where the chamber was and saved her! I still can't believe it, but I'd never tell the Squirt I'm proud of him. We REALLY don't need another Percy walking around. _

_Annoying as Always, _

_Fred_

Fred never told him that they had looked for Ginny with the map. Ron had never heard his brother speak so "openly" about his feelings before. Intrigued, Ron flipped through a bunch more pages and stopped again.

_Hey,_

_Okay, I know this is odd for me, but I'm really worried about Ronniekins. This stupid fight with Harry has gone on long enough. He looks worse than that time I killed his Puffskein and Wonderboy isn't looking much better. And it's not just because we have a lot of money riding on Harry…Well, okay, that's PART of it but…it's…like watching George and I fight. I don't like it. The First Task is starting, I gotta go. Write you again when we get back..._

Ron raised his eyebrows up at this.

"_Fred actually cared about what I was going through?"_ thought Ron as he continued to read on.

_Oh man…you know…when Dumbledore said "dangerous tasks" I didn't think he meant DRAGON level. And I don't think Ron did either…At first he nearly fainted, then it took all the strength Hermione, Neville, Ginny, George, and I had just to keep him from jumping into the stadium. I swear Harry's Hero Complex is starting to rub off on him. _

_A Very Tired,_

_Fred Weasley_

This was certainly not the Fred, Ron was used to. Fred was always callous and didn't care about anyone else's feelings. He was Ron's tormentor…this just didn't make sense!

….Maybe Ron didn't know his brother as well as he thought.

Ron rubbed a spot on his forehead before turning a few more pages. That day held a lot of pain for him, especially after the Locket incident. But Ron once again pushed his emotions down and pressed on.

_Godric,_

_Why does the worst crap in the world always seem to happen to Harry? He's still recovering from his latest bout with You-Know-Who. And truthfully, I don't know how much more the guy can take. He blames himself for what happened to Cedric. I can tell just by the way he looked at that prize money. And honestly…his desperation to get it out of his sight was the only reason George and I accepted it._

If Ron had been drinking a glass of pumpkin juice he would have done a spit take.

"_Harry gave his prize money to Fred and George? So wait…That means __**Harry **__has been the twins' "Secret Benefactor" this entire time? And he didn't TELL ME?"_ thought Ron as he exclaimed, "Well, bloody hell! I just always figured he threw it into the lake for the giant squid!"

Ron glared at the page as he read on…

_Harry told us that more than ever, the world was going to need laughter and he was sure we were the guys for the job…but he did make one request of us…Godric, if Ron ever finds out about this he's going to rip Harry a new one… _

Ron's eyes widened at this, "Wait, WHAT?"

_But Ronniekins getting new dress robes is a small price to pay…don't think he'll buy the story though. _

"I KNEW IT!" screamed Ron as he clenched the Diary in his fists, "I knew they would _never _do such a thing on their own! So….wait…It-it was Harry…but why?"

It was then that the little voice in his heart whispered, _"Because you would have never accepted such an expensive gift from him... He knew you would see it as pity, not for the gift that it was…so he found another way."_

Tears streamed freely down his face and fell onto the pages of the Diary. Harry had thought about Ron's feelings…even when he was in so much pain. And the wound on his heart from the Locket burned once more.

"_I'm such an arse...Next time I see Harry, I'll apologize…again."_

With that Ron flipped forward several pages until he caught the date of his birthday.

_You know Diary,_

_I am really getting sick of this habit that Ron has gotten into of almost __**dying**__ once every year! And this year, he was the closest to achieving his goal yet, on his BIRTHDAY no less! …Hermione is a wreck. Apparently they had a big fight and now he nearly died on her…__**again**__. Oi! Ron, the girl loves you! And everyone, even Harry, knows you love her, you said her name while still unconscious you Wanker! Now snog her silly and be done with it please! I really hope he reads the book George and I got him, because he needs some serious help._

Ron had to laugh at that. Did everyone know they loved each other? He was starting think the answer really was "Yes."

_Harry is not much better than Ginny I'm afraid. He looks about as pale as Ron. I'm starting to wonder if he got a few drops of that poison, too…I remember how at Christmas, Harry came up to me and asked …how I could have tried to make that Unbreakable Vow with Ron._

_I was shocked that Ron even told him about that…no wonder he threw that knife at me that night. I didn't know he'd DIE! I thought…that it meant that every time he tried to tell on me his voice wouldn't let him! I didn't-_

_Damn it, Ron! It makes it really hard for me to…why do you always…oh never mind! I'll smack him upside the head for good measure later. _

_Irate as Ever,_

_Fred_

"Harry confronted him about it…I never knew that…It's okay Fred, I knew that you couldn't have known what the Vow did at the time… Didn't mean I still wasn't pissed about you trying though…And 'Never mind,' what?" asked Ron as he flipped to the last entry in the Diary. Some of the ink had been smeared, but Ron was pretty sure it hadn't been from his tears.

_Well Diary,_

_This is it. The Battle for Hogwarts is going down tonight. I just got the owl from Ginny. George and I will be on our way in a bit. I'm so glad to hear that Ron's okay…I-to be honest I've been worried out of mind since he, Harry, and Hermione left. We…haven't heard anything for months…I guess no news is good news, right? Right…_

_This…isn't a game. I know it's not, even though I give the impression that I do…_

_You know…next to George…I think Ron and I are the most alike._

_We both play the fool. The two of us always brush off problems or worries the others are facing. And what do we do? Make a joke out of it...lighten the mood…Remind the others why life is still worth living._

_All the while, we push our real feelings…our hopes…our fears down for the sake of others. _

_I go on Potterwatch telling others not to freak out that You-Know-Who is at their doorsteps while I keep imagining Ron being dragged away by Death Eaters. _

_We lock all our pain away…so deep in our hearts…that no one could see…so we didn't have to face it…so we wouldn't get burned._

Ron felt the papercut on his finger sting him for the first time since it happened. He looked forlornly at the wound as the blood sluggishly continued to leak out and settle on the surface of the desk.

_I really wish Ron wasn't so much like me…_

_He shouldn't use me as an example…_

_For so long I've locked things away…and it just all turned to hate. _

_Hate for myself… never being able to express what I really felt…_

_That is…until I started writing in this stupid Diary…I'll have to thank Percy for that someday…IF he ever stops being a prat._

Ron felt a tear roll down his face.

_I love my whole family with all my heart. Each and every one of them, even Percy. Please Godric...let him come to his senses…keep them all safe…_

_George is knocking at the door…it's time._

_Let's get this show on the road! I've got places to go and Death Eaters to maim. _

_I'll give those jerks everything I have and then some!_

_Catch you on the flip side._

_-Fred_

Ron quickly closed the Diary as he clenched his right hand over his burning heart. All the cuts he had received from the flying papers, the scars on his arms…everything hurt. He remembered back to the Locket and how it had seen past every defense his heart had…because it was the same.

Ron's heart was a Locket…and the Horcrux knew just how to open it.

This fact, above all else, frightened Ron the most.

The fact that in some way…he was like Voldemort.

The Dark Lord had sealed away his every emotion into the golden Locket…to never have it trouble him again.

At Hogwarts, he put on a front for the rest of the world to see…while his real feelings were pushed down deep into his cold and bitter heart.

Voldemort let nothing go…and neither did Ron.

And it scared him to his very core.

But in reality…that wasn't the case anymore.

Ever since he shattered the Locket…he began to feel again….

He spoke more about his feelings and opinions to Harry and Hermione…and they seemed pleased.

He wished he could speak to Fred…one last time. But since Harry lost the Resurrection Stone, that was most certainly impossible…Besides, he wouldn't have wanted to do it that way. But still, he wished to let Fred know that Ron never hated him….and that he understood his brother a little better now. The Diary had helped Ron come to terms with Fred's passing. He was very glad to have found it….and maybe…in time…he could learn to open up like Harry or Hermione did…

"Ron," called a voice with a knock on the other side of the study door, "You all right in there?"

"Yeah.." said Ron as he quickly wiped his eyes, "Come on in Harry."

"How's the sorting of deadly paper work going?" asked the bespectacled Boy-Who-Lived as he came in offering Ron a pumpkin pastry.

"Actually, quite interesting…" said Ron with a sly smile as he snatched the treat out of Harry's hand and took a big bite.

"Hey! Who said that was for you?" asked Harry kiddingly as he tried to find a place to sit.

Ron smiled as Harry finally just settled for the floor. Harry gave Ron a scathing look when the redhead sat up to his full height in the chair.

"Watch it, Ron. For one day we vertically challenged people will rise up and _then_ you shall be sorry!"

Ron snorted, "Please, it would take all of you standing on each other's shoulders just to reach my waist."

For that Ron received a punch in the leg.

"Ow! Haven't I been abused enough today?"

Harry just rolled his eyes and looked around the study curiously.

"So find anything good?"

Ron's face lit up with a wicked, Fred like grin, "Oh yeah…..So you like Black Mailing my brothers as much as I do. Don't you, Harry?"

Harry's eyes looked puzzled for a moment. Then they suddenly went wide as the color left his face.

He began shifting his eyes around the room frantically, "I- uhhh—Have no idea what you are talking about…"

"Uh huh," said Ron condescendingly as he rested his head on his left hand, "So did you ask Hermione what color they should get me, oh great 'Benefactor?' Because she said the navy blue really brought out my eyes."

"Damn twins," grumbled Harry under his breath as Ron bat his eyes.

"Oh, shut it you!" yelled Harry as he chucked a file at Ron's head.

"I can't wait to tell Mum it was _**you!**_ She's going to kill you, mate!"

Harry growled, "Don't you dare!" as he tackled Ron to the floor.

After several minutes of roughhousing, the two sat back up against the wall.

"Hey, Harry…I'm sorry you thought you had to go through all that just to give me a present," said Ron as he looked away from his friend embarrassed.

Harry just looked at Ron and smiled, "It's okay, mate. I understood why you wouldn't accept it if it came from me."

Ron then went to push the hair out of his eyes when Harry caught sight of the dried blood on Ron's hand.

"Hey, what happened there?" asked Harry as he grabbed Ron's hand to look at the injury.

"It's… a cut that's finally starting to heal…" said Ron with a sigh as he grabbed Fred's Diary from of the desk and walked toward the doorway.

"Come on….I'll show you what I found, I hope George will find this as helpful as I did…"

And with that, the two went downstairs to find George and help him heal as well.

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**-THE END-**

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**Author's Notes:** Hi everyone! Hope you liked it! For more great HP fics, please see my author's page. A lot more one shots can be found there and I love reviews! Write you all again later bye!


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